Beauty of the Struggle

I’ve been completely missing from Tumblr lately.. But that doesn’t mean I’m not...

forthesafetlykept — Sat, 17 Mar 2012 20:50:46 -0400

I’ve been completely missing from Tumblr lately.. But that doesn’t mean I’m not doing well with this whole dealio. I’ve just been waaaay to busy to even function. My life went from nothing to do ever to 100 million things all at the same time. It’s St. Patrick’s Day and in my town that means you party and get drunk. We are HUUUGE on St Pattys. That also means it’s one of three biggest days of the year at work. I’m not going out tonight, though I did yesterday.

I feel like I haven’t had an hour to myself in the past week. It’s alright though… I feel really accomplished that I haven’t slipped up yet. As soon as March is over, I’ll be able to get back to normal and be on here again. Right now, I’m trying to finish this mountain of homework I have due tomorrow and watch my niece. Not working out real well. I’m DD for my sisters tonight… which is pretty shitty cause I have to work at 5AM tomorrow… Oh well.. $$.

I’ll be back Tumblr, I swear…..

(I just read this and I realized how scattered my thoughts are… I guess it’s really only for me….)

PROGRESSS

forthesafetlykept — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 16:10:38 -0400

As expected, I didn’t lose a massive amount. BUT I did make it under 195 like I wanted. I’m at 194.6. Despite the fact that I was locked out of my house today (Nobody in my family even has a key…. how is that even possible? We had to have someone break a window later… wtf?), today turned out to be a pretty good day.

In total, I’ve lost 15.2 pounds AND 14.5 inches! Wooo… I’m still sticking with my goal of 190 by spring break, totally possible. Also, I wanted to be at 182 by graduation, but I’m beginning to think I will surpass that. Now I’m thinking 175, 170.. I guess I’ll decide the closer we get.

Day forty-three: Apart from weight loss, have you noticed any other benefits from your healthy diet?

Uhh… duh. I just listed one up there. Better moods. More energy (If that was possible…). All the stuff they say you will get, but never expect to.

OR you could turn that into TODAY.

forthesafetlykept — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 15:44:58 -0400

OR you could turn that into TODAY.

I didn't even mean to neglect my blog, I swear.

forthesafetlykept — Sun, 11 Mar 2012 20:34:49 -0400

Just so happened I had a very, very… eventful weekend. I missed Tumblr though. I stayed on track for the most part. I defiantly could have been a lot better though. I had so many things to do today, but instead I spent the majority of my day trying to wrap my head around what the fuck happened last night. Very long story, I won’t bore you with it.

But this just means I have many, many things to do tomorrow. Beginning tomorrow, we have training every night this week, and then we open on Saturday. Damn. I’m about to get real busy, and not just because of work. I guess this is the real test huh? I’m also very nervous about weighing in tomorrow. I’m just hoping/praying that if anything, I broke 195. Only a half a pound. That’s not too much to ask for is it? Okay well, I shall get caught up on me questions.

Day forty: Have you gained weight at any point of your journey? How did this effect you?

I have not. I had one weigh-in where I lost only a half pound. Which was somewhat discouraging to me. But then I reminded myself that it was a result of slacking and a loss is a loss.

Day forty-one: Do you drink tea or coffee?

Tea tea tea tea teeeeea. I love tea now. I used to loathe it and now I can’t imagine not drinking it. Just shows you that it doesn’t take long to make something a habit. Coffee- never. Taste is not good to me.

Day forty-two: What is the meaning of life? Just kidding. If you feel happy with the way your body looks before you reach your ultimate goal weight, will you continue to try and lose weight, or will you aim to maintain?

I may maintain, but I guess I won’t know until I get there. I still have a very long way to go before I see real changes like that, so that’s something that hasn’t even crossed my mind yet.

It's so weird how just riding in the car tires you the fuck out.

forthesafetlykept — Sat, 10 Mar 2012 00:35:23 -0500

Goodbye to conscious world.

tastefullyoffensive: [ilovedoodle]

forthesafetlykept — Thu, 08 Mar 2012 19:45:50 -0500

tastefullyoffensive:

[ilovedoodle]

Day thirty-nine: What has been the hardest thing you’ve had to give up?

forthesafetlykept — Thu, 08 Mar 2012 13:04:18 -0500

Hmm.. well I’m not sure I can pinpoint the hardest. But there’s been a lot of things. So much more than just food. I’ve had to give up hanging out with friends as often as I’d like because I have to make time to work out. I’ve had to give up all kinds of delicious foods like chocolate, pasta, cheese… At least give up the way I used to prepare them I’ve had to give up being completely lazy all the time. I’ve had to give up always thinking there was nothing I could do about my situation. I’ve had to give up hours of my time to plan meals/workouts. I’ve had to give up even more time to actually sit down, eat the meal, and enjoy it and to workout.

But those don’t really compare to the things I am gaining. And will gain.

Keep up the good work! I love your blog, you are so real and inspirational!

Thu, 08 Mar 2012 12:59:53 -0500

I plan on it! Thank you so much!

I seriously love everything about this man…

forthesafetlykept — Thu, 08 Mar 2012 09:34:28 -0500

I seriously love everything about this man…

I am so very sleepy...

forthesafetlykept — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 15:51:13 -0500

The weather is so warm and almost raining. All I want to do is get a blanket and nap and watch Grey’s Anatomy. Buuut I promised myself that today I would do my arm/shoulder workout… plus the regular cardio and shizz…

I’ve got all me workout clothes on and the video up but I am lacking the… will to do anything. I have to workout today though… No choice. I won’t be able to Friday so.. ya know.

Okay… 1, 2,…….3… GO.

Day thirty-eight: What do you generally order if you have to eat out at a restaurant?

forthesafetlykept — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 13:11:19 -0500

Well, I’m sure I’ve talked about my town’s greasy spoon. I don’t got there nearly as much as I used to, but now when I do I get two eggs over-easy (Yes, the yolks…..) and whole wheat toast. Not too terrible. But besides White House trips, I’ve only ate out once. I got a burger and fries. And hey, I don’t feel a bit bad about it. It was, and has been, the only REAL cheat meal I’ve allowed myself this whole time. It was delicious and I don’t regret it a bit.

I have been thinking about how excited I am to find healthy foods on the menus of the places we will be eating at over spring brink in new york/DC. Very excited.

Here is some happiness in a mailbox to start out your...

forthesafetlykept — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 08:10:33 -0500

Here is some happiness in a mailbox to start out your morning.

Make it a good one!

Mindset then vs. now

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 22:54:00 -0500

I’ve been thinking quite a bit today about a trip I took over the summer…

It was with my….friend’s parents, brother, grandparents and girlfriend. We drove to South Carolina to see him graduate from basic training and I shared a hotel room with his girlfriend. Everyday she would go down to the gym. And I remember thinking “Why are you doing that?” “She is so tiny and fit….” “That’s the difference between she and I.” “That’s why she gets the boy.”

Now keep in mind here that this ~~boy~~ man and I have been best friends (like actually best friends.. I don’t use that lightly I swear) for over a year. And we were back and forth between dating and not dating and all that stupid stuff. But the point of this is story is not to explain to you my oh so sorrowful and unique (not really…sarcasm at it’s best) boy issues, but to point out to you my mindset at the time. We tried for months to work things out between us and eventually decided that we would be better off friends, which we still remain. During this trip though, I had myself convinced the ENTIRE time that the reason we weren’t together, the reason he was with her, was because she was small and pretty and all the things I was not.

So fucked up huh? Now this man is not the type to be that shallow, and I knew that, but that didn’t stop me from blaming our problems on my weight. And that also didn’t stop me from not doing anything about it. Although I was thoroughly convinced that was the reason, I still did nothing. His girlfriend even asked me one day if I wanted to go with her to the gym and I said no. Instead I wallowed in my misery of being second best.

Well hey guess what guys? I’m tired of not doing anything and wallowing in my misery. So I vow to do something about it now. When I think about that trip, I remember being so torn between being elated I could see him after 3 months, and miserable because I was with her and she was a showcase of all the things I was not. So I vow to start seeing myself for all the things that I am, rather than the things I am not. I was thinking the whole time that the only reason we weren’t together was because of my weight, not because we weren’t meant to be together or any of the other logical reasons. So I vow to define myself as more than just a number.

*Keep in mind please, that me losing this weight is not in an attempt to get him back or anything like that. This situation is just one that sticks out in my mind about how I let my weight control me and cast a negative shadow on an otherwise good situation.

overcoming-obstacles: LMAO

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 22:04:15 -0500

overcoming-obstacles:

LMAO

Oopsies

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 16:38:03 -0500

Forgot to do the question yesterday.. probably cause I was too damn excited.

Day thirty-six: What’s one item of clothing you’d like to wear after losing weight?

Well… tons and tons of things come to mind. But first comes a dress without leggings or a sweater or all that dumb stuff. I just bought a dress today. Put it on when I got home and then decided I had to wear leggings with it. I don’t want to have to do that anymoreeeee…

Day thirty-seven: What do you wear when you go swimming/to the beach?

Honestly I just kind of avoid that kind of stuff all the time. If I’m forced or don’t have a choice I will wear basketball shorts or something and refuse to go in the water. Dumb, self-conscious decisions, I know.

So uh.. just did level 2 of the 30 Day Shred. Hot damn. Didn’t think it would be much harder than level 1.. nope, wrong I was. And now I’m going to finish my ‘Stress Defense’ smoothie and then go spend some time with my dear treadmill. After that comes dinner with these DELICIOUS sweet potatoes mom bought me and theeeen more work training. Tonight I’m all on my own with the session. Grand!

Photo

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 16:29:20 -0500

I thought I would share my lovely mug with the world. Just a normal old Harry Potter mug right?...

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 12:27:00 -0500

I thought I would share my lovely mug with the world.

Just a normal old Harry Potter mug right? WRONG.

When it gets hot, Ron, Hermione, and a bunch of fire show up! Sorry for Ron’s head being cut off… Not enough drinkage left I suppose.

I think a miracle is going to happen..

forthesafetlykept — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 09:56:00 -0500

If things keep going the way they are, my shampoo and conditioner are going to run out at the same time.

God knows that is such a wonderful feeling.

forthesafetlykept — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 18:10:36 -0500

God knows that is such a wonderful feeling.

stopdropandlose: healthylovingandhappy: folloow my fitness...

forthesafetlykept — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 12:46:15 -0500

stopdropandlose:

healthylovingandhappy:

folloow my fitness blog: healthylovingandhappy.tumblr.com/

that is a LOT of popcorn.